Today means the start of something special: Eurovision week.
That’s right – the time is upon us again. After a long, long wait, Eurovision has finally returned to fill our lives with elaborate staging, terrible singing and a smidgen of block voting.
This year promises to be extra special as we celebrate the 60th anniversary of the song contest (with the entry of Australia among other things) – so what will the UK bring to the table. And more importantly, what are our chances of winning?
For a less biased view, I have asked some friends and fellow Eurovision-enthusiasts from across Europe (and beyond) to weigh in on what they make of the UK’s chances of winning this year.
And for those you haven’t yet heard, here is our entry in all its – erm… glory.
Finland
Saana
At the very moment the UK’s entry started, I thought there’s no way I’m listening to this song until the end. After four first seconds it turned out to be something totally different, and for a short moment I even thought it’s not that bad. But before halfway I was already bored with it. At least the song is catchy, as I was listening to it last night and this morning it was still going on in my head.
Could the UK win with this entry? The funny fact with the Eurovision is that you’ll never know how people are going to vote. Most of them will vote with feelings rather than how the actual song is. Honestly, I don’t see the UK being the winner this year.
Scoring would be difficult without listening to all other entries, but in this case the UK gets 6 points from Finland. Finland’s song won’t get even that. I know having a band of disabled musicians will appeal to people, but let’s face it, the song is awful. But it’s fine; we don’t need the Eurovision victory as long as the ice hockey world championship will be ours!
Verdict: 6 points
Ireland
Sarah
Hello my name is Sarah and I’m an ABBA fan… I grew up listening to them. My mother, a die-hard ABBA fan refused to listen to my protests that they were crap and that she’d be much better off playing Nirvana. Over time, I was hooked. The catchy lyrics, the rhythm and ridiculous outfits only encouraged my inner Dancing Queen to shine.
Being Irish, the highlight of my social calendar is the Eurovision. It’s the one international event were Ireland can proudly stand shoulder to shoulder with our European neighbours. We do after all have the highest number of wins – seven to be exact – but who’s counting?
I decided to take a look our closest neighbour’s Eurovision entry – the UK. If Eurovision king Johnny Logan was dead, he’d turn over in his grave.
Don’t get me wrong, I have really tried to like this song but Electro Velvet’s offering for Eurovision 2015 doesn’t meet the UK’s previously high standards. I understand the need to be catchy, this is Eurovision after-all, but this electro-swing number verges on annoying.
After watching their recent “live” performance on The Graham Norton Show, I am genuinely concerned about Electro Velvet’s inability to create an atmosphere on stage. Each year Eurovision acts get bigger, louder and cheesier and in a world of half-naked Polish women and super cute Russian grannies, I worry that the UK entry will be forgotten about.
The winner may take it all but the only thing the UK will be taking home, is a key-ring from duty free.
Verdict: 3 points for effort
Australia
Dacia
Now, theoretically, an Aussie would like to vote for its fair cousin, the UK, right? But – and that’s a big but – voting for Eletro Velvet’s massive cheese-overload, would, quite simply, be an insult to the many other impressive Eurovision entries.
Sure, the colourful Electro Swing rendition is big, brash and original. I really have no beef with the cheery choreography and I don’t doubt that it will make an entertaining feat on the Eurovision stage.
But that’s if you’re willing to endure aural suicide, that is. I don’t know about you, but I got my fill of the Electro Swing genre with The Great Gatsby, followed by the brief boom of similar-sounding songs that jumped on the movie soundtrack’s success. Still in Love With You could have still been OK, were if not for the cheap and garbled electronica, flat vocals and teeth-clenching skiddy-beep-bop-doo’s.
Out of 12 points, I would give the UK duo 4 points (in anticipation of their spectacularly-kitsch stage choreography) and -8 points for the ear-splitting song itself.
Verdict: 4 points
In closing
It’s not looking good for the UK this year. If our cultural cousins Ireland and Australia aren’t feeling this huge dose of vintage cheese, can we really expect the sway the people of Belarus, Iceland or Azerbaijan?
I am normally a huge advocate for the UK entry, but I just don’t understand the logic behind this choice from the BBC. Frankly, it’s embarrassing. I really thought the UK had turned a corner last year with a solid, contemporary track. Fair enough, we did only come 17th but it was a song people could rally behind.
Electro Velvet is an bold idea that should have been shot down in the board room and it shows us just how out of step with Europe we really are.
It’s nil points from me.
What do you think of the UK entry this year?
Comment below!
The authors
A native Finn, Saana has travelled extensively in Europe, the Americas and the Caribbean. Having lived in both Spain and Germany, Saana is now back in Finland, where her hobbies include travel, blogging and trying every kind of sport imaginable – including beer crate climbing.
Saana writes at Live Now Dream Later.
Born and raised in Ireland, Sarah now lives in lively Cologne. A foodie at heart, she enjoys seeking out new cafes and restaurants as well as trying her hand at cooking. Her current hobbies include scouring Netflix for new TV series and sarcastic humour.
Sarah writes for Checkin, the travel blog from trivago.
Dacia is a Sydney-native and collector of tea and scented candles. She’s lived on three continents and has travelled most extensively in Japan, where she spent two years learning the local culture and onsen-hopping. She aspires to spend her free time reading, learning languages (her current project is German) and scouring the web for new movies.
Dacia writes for Checkin, the travel blog from trivago.
Don’t take anything serious what I say, we didn’t even get to top 3 this year! (I’m talking about ice hockey again, obviously.) Saana is soooo sad… life is over for another year now. 🙁
AND you’re out of Eurovision… sad times….
It is a bit of a shocker. I put a quid on Armenia at 100-1 after reading your last post. Reckon they can do it?
I reckon they will make top 10 – not sure about winning though. They have drawn to perform in the first half of the final, which normally reduces the chances of a win…
You know, I hated the song when I first heard it, but listening to it again, I found it quite fun, better than some other snooze fest songs. No chances of winning, but I’d give it a 6, haha.
I do think it’s quite catchy if I’m honest, but that doesn’t work if you only hear the song once. It needs to be instantly likeable and it isn’t.
Too bad if people start liking it a week later…
It’s nil points from me too, I just don’t understand how we (the UK) get this so very very wrong! I love a bit of flapper-esque dancing, but this is more like a club scene from Poirot than a Great Gatsby party. Oh, for shame.
I bloody love the Finnish entry, ok, so it’s a bit loud and shouty, but I like what they’re trying to say! At least they’re passionate, which is more than I can say for our vacuous entry!
I agree – we are always so wrong with Eurovision and yet most UK artists have great success in Europe. Even without using famous acts, surely we know what songs do well in Europe???
I liked the message behind Finland but as a song it just didn’t work. I’m not really sorry they were eliminated.